Alms, alms - Uh Spare Me!

I was on my way to Quiapo on Saturday morning after my shift from work to hunts for worth watching movies or TV series because unless no planned gimmick or errands to run, my weekend typically spent by watching DVDs.

I took the bus, it's the most convenient way to get you to Quiapo via Taft. Three blocks after passing the RCBC Plaza, a man in his mid 50s or atleast that's how I pictured him, along with other passengers came climbing in.

Since it's quite early, vacant seats were everywhere but this particular man instead of taking the seat he just remain standing the alley and minutes later started his monologue.

The scene is not news to me. I mean, commuter bus is my way of getting to my work and all form of solicitation can be witnessed. From a laid-off worker, an out-of-school-youth claiming to be family's bread-winner, who would insist you from buying their products (candies), a tribe member who escaped from the insurgence stricken Mindanao and ofcourse to those who preach the so-called good news (gospels).

I'm not trying to be mean here but I don't approve these nuisances. If I want to give donation in the service of God's works, I'll go straight to the church and not inside a commuter bus for chrissake.

Now, if you want to tell me how poor or starve you are and with that sad stories and all, come on - get yourself a job and not by asking everyone who by the way, this everyone you are pestering also has a family to fed on, for crying-out-loud.

And did you say, you are starving for two days? Look at the fats, they're trying to escape from your big belly. And for your information you don't look like you are underfed, go get yourself a mirror - will yah!

By the way, you just clarified before your sermon that this preaching is for free and why are you handing me this donation envelop? Get real, hypocrite!

Now, before I lost my temper, lol. Let's continue the story...

... The man started his monologue by apologizing the inconvenience it could cause to the passengers/everyone and thanking the driver and conductor for letting him raise his plea.

He said, they were very poor and he's asking for any donation the passengers can extend/help to his family. His sister died the other night when giving birth to her son. His sister's husband is only a tricycle driver and his income is not enough for the funeral service.

Then he reiterated that he has documents to support the death of his sister. The Death Certificate, Barangay Clearance and the picture.

Sounds convincing - the story is heart-breaking, the documents look perfect. This -- if you hear it first time. But hell, this is the very man asking the same the other month only in a different bus and time.

One by one, he approached passengers by showing the documents, when he's near me beside my seat, he did the same. And I am such an idiot that I actually leaned over him to see what's in his hand.


I was taken aback and on the verged of shrieking, "What the Fuck"! Stapled over the Death Certificate is a picture of a woman with an overused foundation and all white inside a coffin.

I want to shoot him, that instant. Then, I remember I never had a gun, lol. Damn. My blood came running up my head. If there is one thing, I'm dreading in this world is the sight of a coffin. Can you imagine there's someone inside?! Jeebus!

You really know how to murder a nice sunny morning, don't you? Do you really need to scare everyone? Where's the freakin' and fuckin' manner, man?

Got out the bus, with heavy heart. Now, define BAD TRIP! I'll take Taxi cab next time... lol!